Halloween Jokes for Kids: Free Printable Lunch Box Cards

Halloween jokes are one of the easiest ways to add a little laughter to October. Tuck one into a lunch box, read it out loud at a classroom party, or trade a few on the drive to the pumpkin patch. This collection has 168 free Halloween jokes, puns, and riddles for kids, plus knock knock jokes, dad jokes, and a free printable lunch box joke card set you can download.

There’s a kid friendly laugh here for every part of October, from lunch box notes to a few giggles before bed.

Best Halloween Jokes for Kids

Looking for the funniest Halloween jokes for kids? These are some of my favorites to share at school, around the dinner table, or on the way to a Halloween party.

• Why is a ghost a messy eater? He’s always gobblin’.
• Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
• Why didn’t the skeleton cross the street? He didn’t have any guts.
• How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? At night he turns into a bat.
• What is a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling.
• Why are ghosts bad at telling lies? You can see right through them.
• What kind of mistakes do ghosts make? Boo-boos.
• What is a ghost’s favorite street? A dead end.
• Why are graveyards so noisy? Because of all the coffin!
• What do spiders like to do? Fly fishing.
• What is a mummy’s favorite kind of music? Wrap music.
• What do you call a witch at the beach? A sand witch!

Halloween Jokes for Little Ones

Younger kids tend to do best with short, simple wordplay rather than longer riddles. These ten are some of the gentlest, easiest jokes in the whole collection, great for preschool and early elementary ages.

• What do you call a witch at the beach? A sand witch!
• How do you make a skeleton laugh? You tickle his funny bone!
• What is a ghost’s favorite street? A dead end.
• What kind of mistakes do ghosts make? Boo-boos.
• What do skeletons fly around in? A scareplane or a skelecopter.
• What did the fisherman say on Halloween? Trick or trout.
• What do you call a fat pumpkin? A plumpkin.
• What do baby ghosts wear on their little feet? Booties!
• What game do baby ghosts like to play? Peek-a-Boo!
• What do you call Winnie the Pooh on Halloween? Winnie the Boo!

Halloween Lunch Box Jokes: Print for Free

Wish your kids a “bone appetit” with these silly Halloween jokes! Download and print the cards in color on white cardstock, then cut them apart and tuck them into a lunch box, backpack, or pocket. With cute cartoons and fun fonts, they’re a simple way to slip a little extra fun into school lunches all October long, and let your kids know you’re thinking about them.

Packing more than jokes this month? Pair these with our free printable Halloween juice box covers for a matching treat. Looking for more free printables? Check out my Halloween Coloring Pages.

Kick off the fun at a Halloween party with these silly Halloween jokes and puns. They’re perfect for getting kids laughing, breaking the ice, and adding a little extra fun to any celebration. You might also like to play these Halloween games at your next get-together, and here are some easy Halloween costumes to go with them. The rest of the jokes are grouped by character below, so it’s easy to find your favorite kind.

Ghost & Spirit Jokes

• Why is a ghost a messy eater? He’s always gobblin’.
• Why are ghosts bad at telling lies? You can see right through them.
• What kind of mistakes do ghosts make? Boo-boos.
• What is a ghost’s favorite street? A dead end.
• What does the ghost call his sweetheart? His ghoul friend.
• What does a ghost need to go spook forest creatures? A haunting license!
• What does a ghost do to stay safe in a car? Puts on his sheet belt.
• What’s a little ghost’s favorite dessert? I-scream.
• What is in a ghost’s nose? Boo-gers.
• Where do fashionable ghosts shop? Bootiques.
• What do ghosts wear when their eyesight gets blurred? Spooktacles.
• Who did the scary ghost invite to his party? Any old friend he could dig up!
• Where do ghosts go on holidays? The Boohamas.
• What did one ghost say to the other? Get a life!
• Where do ghosts like to travel on vacation? The Dead Sea!
• Where do baby ghosts go during the day? Day-scare.
• What did the mother ghost say to the baby ghost as they drove down the street? Buckle your sheet belt!
• How do ghosts search the Web? They use ghoul-gle.
• Where do ghosts like to trick-or-treat? Dead ends.
• Why do ghosts like to hang out at bars? Because all of the Boos.
• What do you call a dancing ghost? Polka-haunt-us.
• Why do ghosts hate when it rains on Halloween? It dampens their spirits.
• Why do ghosts make the best cheerleaders? Because they have spirit.
• What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost? Bamboo.
• What do you call a chicken that haunts your house? A poultrygeist.
• Why do ghosts love going to Six Flags? Because they can ride lots of roller-GHOST-ers.
• What is a ghost’s favorite meal? Spook-ghetti.
• Why do girl ghosts go on diets? So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
• Why can’t the boy ghost have babies? Because he has a Hallo-weenie.
• What do female ghosts use to do their makeup? Vanishing Cream!
• What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog? He is mist.
• What kinds of pants do ghosts wear? Boo-jeans.
• How does a ghost get its girlfriend’s attention? “Hey, boo!”
• Why do ghosts never date each other? Someone is bound to ghost.
• Why do ghosts like sales? They’re bargain haunters!
• What game do baby ghosts like to play? Peek-a-Boo!
• How do you know when a ghost is sad? He starts boo-hooing.
• What’s a ghost’s favorite play? Romeo and Ghoul-iet.
• What day do ghosts do their howling? On Moan-day!
• What do ghosts turn on in summer? The scare-conditioner!
• What is a ghost’s favourite bedtime story? Little Boo Peep!
• What game do young ghosts love? Hide and shriek!
• What do ghosts use to wash their hair? Sham-boo!
• What do baby ghosts wear on their little feet? Booties!
• What is the first sign your house is haunted? Your sheets are missing.
• Where do ghosts mail letters? The ghost office.

Love ghost jokes? Don’t miss my full collection of Ghost Jokes.

Vampire & Dracula Jokes

• How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? At night he turns into a bat.
• What happens when two vampire bats meet? Love at first bite!
• What does Count Dracula use to cross the sea? A blood vessel!
• Why is it so unpleasant to hang out with Dracula? He’s a pain in the neck.
• Where does a vampire keep his money? A blood bank.
• What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
• How do vampires get around on Halloween? On blood vessels.
• How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery? All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.
• What can you catch from a vampire in winter? Frostbite.
• What would be the national holiday for a nation of vampires? Fangs-giving!
• How do you know vampires love baseball? They turn into bats every night.
• What did one thirsty vampire say to the other as they were passing the morgue? Let’s stop in for a cool one!
• What is a vampire’s pet peeve? A tourniquet!
• How does a vampire enter his house? Through the bat flap!
• Why couldn’t Dracula’s wife get to sleep? Because of his coffin.
• What is a vampire’s favorite fruit? A neck-tarine.
• Why didn’t the vampire attack Taylor Swift? Because she had bad blood.
• What’s it called when a vampire has trouble with his house? A grave problem.
• What is it called when Dracula rearranges his furniture with his teeth? Fang-shui.
• Why can’t a vampire go to a barbecue? They’re afraid of stakes.
• How do vampires like movie stars? Medium rare.
• How does Dracula stay fit? He plays bat-minton!
• Why did the vampire need to wash its mouth? It had bat breath.
• Where do vampires eat their lunch? At the casketeria.
• What type of coffee does a vampire drink? De-coffin-ated!
• What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher? Lots of blood tests!
• What is Dracula’s favourite ice-cream flavour? Vein-illa!
• What song do vampires hate? “You Are My Sunshine!”

Witch & Skeleton Jokes

• Why didn’t the skeleton cross the street? He didn’t have any guts.
• What is a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling.
• What do you call a witch at the beach? A sand witch!
• Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop!
• What do you call witches who live together? Broom mates!
• What happened to the witch who flew her broom while angry? She flew off the handle.
• Why did the witch take a nap? She needed to rest a spell.
• How do you make a skeleton laugh? You tickle his funny bone!
• What do you call a witch’s garage? A broom closet.
• What sound do witches make when they eat cereal? Snap, Cackle & Pop!
• Why did the skeleton climb up the tree? Because a dog was after his bones!
• What do skeletons fly around in? A scareplane or a skelecopter.
• What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? A sax-a-bone.
• Wanna know why skeletons are so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
• What type of plates do skeletons like to use? Bone china.
• Why are skeletons so good at chopping down trees? They’re lumbarjacks!
• Who won the skeleton beauty contest? No body.
• How do you get inside a locked cemetery at night? Use a skeleton key to unlock the gates!
• What do witches put on to go trick-or-treating? Mas-scare-a.
• What do witches ask for at a hotel? Broom service.
• What do skeletons order at a restaurant? Spare ribs.
• What’s a skeleton’s favorite song? “Bad to the Bone.”
• What does a skeleton say before eating? Bone appetit!
• How do you make a witch scratch? Take away the “w”!
• What did the wizard say to the twin witches? Which witch is which?
• What do you call a skeleton who lays around all day? Lazy bones.
• Why don’t they play music in skeleton church? They don’t have organs!

Skeleton jokes are a hit in this house. See even more in my Skeleton Puns.

Mummy & Zombie Jokes

• Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
• What is a mummy’s favorite kind of music? Wrap music.
• Why don’t mummies take the day off? They don’t want to unwind.
• What kind of bread do zombies like? Whole brain.
• What’s a zombie’s favorite cereal? Rice Creepies.
• Why did the baby wrap itself in white cloth strips? It was just trying to be just like its mummy.
• Why didn’t the mummy have any friends? He was too wrapped up in himself.
• Why didn’t the zombie go to school? He felt rotten!
• Where do mummies like to swim? The Dead Sea.
• What did the baby zombie want for her birthday? A deady bear.
• What kind of underwear do mummies wear? Fruit of the Tomb.
• What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? Hope it’s Halloween!
• What do you call a mummy eating in bed? A crummy mummy.
• What does it take to become a zombie? Deadication.

Pumpkin & Trick or Treat Jokes

• What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi.
• How do you fix a damaged jack-o-lantern? You use a pumpkin patch.
• What did the fisherman say on Halloween? Trick or trout.
• What do you call a fat pumpkin? A plumpkin.
• Why do jack-o-lanterns have wicked smiles? Because they just had their brains scooped out!
• What Halloween candy should you give trick-or-treaters if you want them to think you’re rich? A 100 Grand candy bar.
• What did the little boy say when he had to choose between a tricycle and candy? Trike or Treat!
• Where do you find the spookiest sweets on Halloween? The ghost-ery store.

Carving a pumpkin this year? Grab my free Pumpkin Carving Stencils.

Looking for more Halloween fun? Learn how to draw a cute ghost with our easy Ghost Drawing tutorial or grab a pencil and follow along with my step by step Witch Drawing guide. They’re perfect for kids, classrooms, and Halloween afternoons at home.

More Spooky & Silly Halloween Jokes

• Why are graveyards so noisy? Because of all the coffin!
• Why did the Headless Horseman go into business? To get ahead in life!
• Why do they put fences around the graveyard? People are dying to get in.
• What kind of monster is the best dancer? The boogieman.
• Why was the cemetery chosen to be the perfect location to write a movie? Because it had great plots.
• What do demons eat for breakfast? Deviled eggs.
• How do scarecrows like to drink? With a straw.
• What goes “Ha-ha-ha-ha!” right before a gigantic sounding crash and then keeps laughing? A monster laughing its head off!
• What has hundreds of ears but can’t hear a thing? A cornfield!
• What goes around a haunted house and never stops? A fence.
• Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story? Because there are so many plots there!
• What happened to the man who didn’t pay his exorcist? The house was repossessed.
• What did the girl horse dress up as for Halloween? A night mare.
• What’s the best way to get rid of a demon? Exorcise a lot.
• Where is the best place to party on Halloween? The g-RAVE-yard.
• How do monsters like their eggs? Terror-fried.
• Why didn’t the coffee bean go to the Halloween party? Because it was grounded.
• What is a recess at a mortuary called? A coffin break!
• What monster plays tricks on Halloween? Prank-enstein!
• What does a ghoul put on its pizza? Monster-ella cheese!
• What do you call Winnie the Pooh on Halloween? Winnie the Boo!
• Did you hear about the monster who ate his own house? He was homesick.
• Why did Dr. Jekyll cross the road? To get to the other Hyde!
• What do sea monsters eat for lunch? Potato ships!
• What do devils drink? Demonade.
• What kind of cheese do monsters eat? Monsterella!
• What do black cats like to eat on hot days? Mice cream cones.
• What do spiders like to do? Fly fishing.

Halloween Knock Knock Jokes for Kids

How about a funny Halloween knock knock joke? Knock knock jokes are an easy win for younger kids since the setup never changes, which makes them simple to memorize and retell.

• Knock knock. Who’s there? Phillip! Phillip who? Please, Phillip my bag with Halloween candy.
• Knock knock. Who’s there? Candy. Candy who? Come on, candy door open any slower?
• Knock knock. Who’s there? Boo! Boo who? Don’t cry, I’m just a trick-or-treater!
• Knock knock. Who’s there? Witch! Witch who? Witch one of you will give me Halloween candy?
• Knock knock. Who’s there? Wanda! Wanda who? Wanda go trick-or-treating tonight?
• Knock knock. Who’s there? Ice cream! Ice cream who? Ice cream every time I see a ghost!

Looking for more? Browse my full collection of Knock Knock Jokes for Kids.

Halloween Dad Jokes

Are you a fan of puns and dad jokes? You know the ones. Everyone rolls their eyes, and every dad is convinced he’s the funniest person in the room.

• What room is left out of a ghost’s house? The living room.
• Where do ghosts go on vacation? Lake Erie.
• What do skeletons order at restaurants? Spare ribs.
• What would you find on a haunted beach? A sand-witch!
• Why don’t mummies have friends? Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves.
• Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? He was outstanding in his field.
• What do you call a pumpkin that hits the gym? A jacked-o-lantern.
• Why did the vampire subscribe to the newspaper? He heard it had great circulation.
• What’s a dad’s favorite part of trick-or-treating? Doing the candy “inspection” after the kids go to bed.
• Why did Frankenstein’s monster never lose a race? He always had a leg up on the competition.
• What do you call a witch who’s also a comedian? A real spell-binder.

Dad’s just getting started. See the rest of his material in my Dad Jokes.

What Makes a Good Halloween Joke for Kids?

The best Halloween jokes for kids share a few things in common: a familiar character like a ghost, witch, or skeleton, a simple setup, and a punchline built on wordplay rather than anything scary. That’s exactly what makes them so easy to memorize and retell, which is half the fun of tucking one into a lunch box in the first place.

Ways to Use These Halloween Jokes

These kid friendly Halloween jokes are perfect for:

• Halloween lunch box notes
• Classroom parties
• Halloween party games
• Trick-or-treat events
• Family dinner conversation starters
• Boo baskets – Putting together a boo basket for a neighbor or friend? Grab my free You’ve Been Booed Printables to go with it.

Print the free joke cards and tuck them into lunch boxes, backpacks, notebooks, or Halloween treat bags for a surprise laugh.

However you end up using them, the goal is the same: a quick, easy laugh that doesn’t take any extra effort on a busy October day.

Halloween Jokes FAQ

More Jokes for Kids

Don’t miss these other silly kids’ jokes! Brighten up someone’s day with a surprise joke. All these jokes are on little cards perfect for school lunches and fun hiding spots.

• Kid approved Kids’ Jokes!
• Taffy lovers will love these Laffy Taffy Jokes
• Elf Jokes
• Ghost Jokes
• Skeleton Puns
• Over 30 FUNNIEST Valentines Day Jokes!
• Funny Food Jokes to print and share!
• FUNNY Christmas Jokes To Share A Giggle
• Skull Puns

Browse all of my Funny jokes to share so you can spread the laughter in any situation. What are your best funny kids’ jokes? Leave a comment and share your corny hits!