Do you like fish jokes? If so, you’re in for a treat with over 100 of the funniest fish jokes that will make you laugh out loud. Whether you are a fishing enthusiast or just enjoy a good fish pun, these jokes are sure to entertain you. So sit back, relax, and enjoy some funny fish humor!

silly puffer fish
  1. Where do fish keep their money? In the riverbank.
  2. How do religious fish always start off their prayers? Dear cod.
  3. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
  4. What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Damn.
  5. Why did the fish get bad grades? Because it was below sea level.
  6. What do you call a fish with two legs? A two-knee fish.
  7. What do you call a fish with no legs? A fish.
  8. Where do goldfish love to travel? Usually just around the globe.
  9. What was the fish who was a huge Rick Astley fan singing? Never gonna give you up! Never gonna let you drown! Never gonna swim around and splash you!
  10. Why don’t fish like playing basket ball? They are terrified of nets.
  11. Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
  12. Where do you find a fish in orbit? Trouter space
  13. What is the best way to communicate with a fish? Drop it a line.
  14. Which country do fish like to go for a vacation? Finland.
  15. What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can’t tuna piano.
  16. What kind of music do fish love to rave to? Drum and bass.
  17. What day of the week do all fish dislike the most? Fryday.
  18. Why do fish always know how much they weigh? They have their own built in set of scales.
  19. What did the fish say to his friend who was acting extremely shy? Stop being so koi.
  20. Where are most fish found? Between head and tail.
  21. What did the fish say when he saw an old friend that that he hadn’t seen in ages? Long time no sea.
  22. What do fish do when an emergency occurs? The sea kelp.
  23. What is all the fish’s favourite boyband? New squids on the block.
  24. What do you call a fake koi fish? A de koi.
  25. How do you spot a cinderella fish? They have glass flippers.
  26. What did a shark eat with its peanut butter sandwich? A jellyfish.
  27. What kind of fish only comes out at night? A starfish.
  28. How do shellfish get to the hospital? In a clambulance.
  29. What did one fish say to the other? Keep your mouth shut and you won’t get caught.
  30. A little fish walks into a bar. The bartender asks the fish “What can I get you?”The little fish replies (gasping) “Water! I need water!”
  31. What do you call a fish that won’t shut up? A big-mouthed bass.
  32. Why are fish cleverer than people? Ever see a fish spend a fortune trying to catch a human?
  33. What do you call a fish with lots of money? A goldfish.
  34. What’s the fastest fish in the lake? A motor-Pike.
  35. What do fish take to stay healthy? Vitamin Sea.
  36. What is the most famous fish you can catch? A starfish.
  37. What do you call a fish that practices medicine? A Sturgeon.
  38. Why do fish swim in schools? Because they can’t walk.
  39. Where do fish go to borrow money? A loan-shark.
  40. What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant? Swimming trunks.
  41. Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
  42. What’s the fish that makes this sound “ shhhhhhhhhhhhh” ? The fried fish.
  43. What do you call a fish that is not smart? A dumb bass.
  44. What did the fish 🐟 get on his math test? A sea plus.I’m sorry for all the fish puns.
  45. I feel so GILL-ty.How do fish go into business? They start on a small scale!
  46. How do you make a goldfish old? You take away the “g.”
  47. Who granted the fish’s wish? The fairy cod mother!
  48. What did the goldfish say when he got fed? “Tank poo.”
  49. How do you make a goldfish age? Take out the “g” and “fish.”
  50. What do you call a group of singing fish? A choral reef.
  51. What’s weirder than seeing a cat fish? Watching a goldfish bowl.
  52. Did you hear about the goldfish that went bankrupt? Now he’s a bronze fish.
  53. What did the fish artist say to the art curator about his latest piece? “Hey, would you mind letting minnow what you think about this one?”
  54. What did the fish dating guru say to the hopeful sea bass? “If you’re going for roe-mance, you’ll want to consider the caviar.”
  55. Why aren’t there every any job openings at the fish company? They’ve been scaling back.
  56. What did one fatty tuna say to the other? “We’re in this together, toro and toro.”
  57. What do you call a singing fish? A tuna.
  58. What did the shark say after eating a clownfish? That tasted a little bit funny!
  59. What do whales have for dinner? They eat fish and ships!
  60. How do you catch a unique zebrafish? Unique up on it.
  61. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fisually impaired.
  62. What do you call a fish with cable? Telefishion.
  63. What competetion do fish enter? The Great British Hake Off!
  64. How does a shark greet a fish? Pleased to eat you!
  65. What is the most envious fish? The jelly-fish
  66. Where do fish sleep? In the riverbed.
  67. What fish sounds the most like a harp? A carp.
  68. What kind of fish belongs in a circus? A clownfish.
  69. What do you call a religious fish poem? A Psalmon.
  70. How do you call a fish that has trouble walking? Limpin Karp
  71. What do you call two barracuda fish? A pairacuda.
  72. What kind of fish likes to try new food? Betta tester.
  73. What do you call a fish that can dunk? swooshi.
  74. What did the fish say when it swam into the dam? Minnows.
  75. Who is the fish’s valentine? His Gil-Friend!
  76. What kind of music do fish listen to? Something catchy.
  77. What kind of fish eats mice? A catfish
  78. What did the fish say to the fisherman? “No one will ever believe you.”
  79. What do u call a fish with a bow tie? So-fish-ticated
  80. What do you call a fish that provides woodland services, primarily pruning and treatments to preserve old or damaged trees. A tree sturgeon
  81. What do you call a fish that’s switched on? A sam-ON
  82. Who’s the wealthiest fish in the sea? Gill Gates, the flounder of Mackerelsoft
  83. What do you call a fish doctor? A Sturgeon.
  84. How do shellfish take photos? With a clam-era.
  85. What does a fish wear to keep warm? A shoal!
  86. What do fish sing during winter? Christmas corals!
  87. Why are fish so lucky? They seize every oppor-tuna-ty.
  88. Where does a killer whale go for braces? The Orca-Dontist.
  89. Why do fish eat worms? Because they get hooked on them!
  90. Why do fish always lose their court cases? They are always gill-ty.
  91. What happens when you mix a fish and a banker? You get a loan shark.
  92. What do you call a fish that needs help with his or her vocals? Autotuna
  93. Why will fish never take responsibility? Because it’s always salmon else’s fault.
  94. How can you tell the puffer-fish had too much salt at dinner? He’s looking blow-ted.
  95. What’s the only right answer when a salmon asks you for a light? I didn’t know you smoked, salmon.
  96. Why was the shark angry about leaving the restaurant early? Because he couldn’t even fin-ish his meal.
  97. What game show do fish love the most? Name that tuna!
  98. How did the oyster manage to hide from the fish? Clamouflage!
  99. What did one fatty tuna say to the other? “We’re in this together, toro and toro.”
  100. What did the Mum shark say to the kid shark? Watch that sharkasm, young man!
  101. What do fish use to help them hear? A herring aid!
  102. Which musical instruments can catch fish? Castanets!

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