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These nut jokes will have you rolling on the floor with laughter. If you are looking for a good laugh or want something to share with your friends, read on.
We love a good joke and have a great collection of kid’s jokes you won’t want to miss. You will be able to get a few eye rolls with these dad jokes. Put these food jokes in a kid’s lunch. Free cute printable cards make it easy.
Funny Nut Jokes
This list of jokes has everything from funny nut puns, to quotes about nuts, to hilarious jokes about peanuts. I hope you like these nutty jokes! I think they will crack you up.
- How do you make a cashew laugh? You crack him up
- Why did the nut work at the bank? To cashew your check.
- What do you call a pair of nuts on the wall? Walnuts!
- What do you call a walnut that likes to exercise? A health nut.
- What did one nut chasing another nut say? I am going to cashew.
- What is a squirrel’s favorite ballet? The nutcracker.
- Who eats nuts and bolts? A squirrel that is late for work.
- Why did the squirrel want a raise in pay? He was paid peanuts.
- Which nut has won the World Cup the most? A Brazil nut.
- Which nut loves the game of chess? A Chess-nut
- Where do nuts get their gas? A Shell Station.
- Why are squirrels good at explaining things? Because they give it to you in a nutshell.
- What did the squirrel wear on his feet? Cashews.
- What does a squirrel eat at a fair? Acorn dog.
- Why did the peanut run across the busy highway? It was nuts.
- Who would name their daughter Macadamia? A couple of nuts.
- Where can you learn more about nuts? The internut.
- When did the peanut butter say it would arrive? In a Jif.
- What did the grape jelly say to the peanut butter? You’re nuts!
- What did the man say about the new almond diet where you only eat foods made from almonds. Almond milk, almond butter, almond everything? That’s just nuts
- Why did the police have a hard interrogating the thief? Because it’s a tough nut to crack.
- My dad said, “I will start my journey today and I walnut fail.”
- My dad made a playlist for hiking. He calls it his trail mix.
- What happens to a nut when it is nervous? It cracks.
- Have you tried almond milk? It’s unlike any udder milk.
- What do you call mixed nuts? Cashews with obstacles.
- What do you call a nut on the wall? A Walnut.
So what was your favorite? Did you like the almond puns, acorn puns, or the trail mix dad joke? In a nutshell, I hope you found these jokes funny!
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We are nuts for nuts! Find some more nutty fun with these recipes and gifts.