We are so excited to share with you these super funny, family-friendly cat jokes! You can print them or write them down and put them on your kids’ lunchbox to help them start their day with a smile.

Cat lovers will enjoy celebrating their feline friends with this huge collection of funny cat jokes!

laughing cat

Hilarious Cat Jokes

  1. Why did the cats ask for a drum set? They wanted to make some mewsic!
  2. Why did the cat have to go to an accountant? They got caught up in a purramid scheme.
  3. What’s a cat’s favorite TV show? Claw and Order.
  4. What made the cat upgrade his phone? He wanted to finally get pawtrait mode.
  5. How did the mom cat know she was pregnant? Her test was pawsitive.
  6. Why are kittens actually excellent bosses? They have great littership.
  7. What normally happens when kitties go on a first date? They hiss.
  8. What’s it called when all the treats are gone? A cat-astrophe.
  9. What’s a cat’s favorite cereal? Mice Krispies.
  10. Why did the teenage cat call her parents when she found an apartment she liked?
  11. She needed them to (cali)co-sign her lease.
  12. What color do kittens love the most? Purrple.
  13. Why are cats so good at video games? They start with nine lives.
  14. What does a choir of cats like to sing? “Do-Re-Mew.”
  15. What does the cat say after making a joke? “Just kitten!”
  16. Before going after a mouse, what did the dad cat say to his family? “Let us prey.”
  17. When cats need to go to the airport, who do they call? A tabby.
  18. There are ten cats on a boat. One jumps off, how many are left? None, they were all copy cats.
  19. What did the kitten have at their birthday party? A pounce house.
  20. What title does a cat go by in the kitchen? The Whisker.
  21. What do you call it when a cat is super-stylish? Haute cat-ture.
  22. What was the kitten bowling league called? Alley Cats.
  23. Why did the kitty get an “A” on their English assignment? They properly used an independent claws.
  24. Why is it hard to trust cats? They have many tall tails.
  25. When a cat doesn’t want to say goodbye, what do they say instead? “See ya litter!”
  26. What did the cats do when they realized they had a bad plan? They decided to (cat)nip it in the bud.
  27. Why don’t you want to play Monopoly with a cat? They tend to be cheetahs.
  28. Before a cat fight, what is usually said? “Hold my purrse.”
  29. What did the mom cat say about her intuition? “I just had a strong feline.”
  30. What is a French cat’s favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse.
  31. What do cats quote from the movie Bridesmaids? “Help me, I’m paw!”
  32. Why was the teenage cat sent to his room? He was in a bad meowd.
  33. What do cats look for in a significant other? A great purrsonality.
  34. What did one cat say while her friend was complaining? “Tail me about it.”
  35. What do you call a cat who became a doctor? A first-aid kitten.
  36. What do cats call a big pile of laundry? A meowtain to climb.
  37. Why do cats hate laptops? They don’t have a mouse.
  38. Why did the cat avoid eating lemons? They made him a sour-puss.
  39. How did one cat break up with another? She said, “We’re hisstory!”
  40. What song do kittens always request at dances? “Mice Mice Baby.”
  41. Why don’t cats ever say “YOLO”? They have nine lives.
  42. Why are cats bad at making decisions? They become so purrplexed.
  43. Which day of the week do cats love the most? Caturday.
  44. What’s a cat’s favorite sport? Hairball.
  45. Is it very bad luck to see a black cat? That depends if you’re a mouse or a human.
  46. Why do cats make horrible DJs? They always paws the tunes.
  47. Why was the animal lover so untrustworthy? She kept letting the cat out of the bag!
  48. What did the mom and dad cat say about their wedding day? “It was unfurrgetable!”
  49. What do cats call a nice dinner? A fancy feast.
  50. What’s a cat’s favorite button on the tv remote? The paws button.
  51. What’s a kitten’s fave way to shop? By cat-alogue.
  52. What did the sick cat say? “I feel clawful!”
  53. How did the cat comic know he was funny? The audience was meow-ling with laughter.
  54. Why did some cat friends go to the mall? There was a buy-one-get-one-furry deal.
  55. How do French cats say, “Thank You”? Meow-ci Beaucoup
  56. Where do cats enjoy spending a family day?
  57. The mew-seum.If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on? Their paws.
  58. What’s a kitten’s favorite kind of sticker? Scratch and sniff.
  59. What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? The purr-petrator.
  60. What do you call a feline with a short haircut? A bob cat, of course
  61. What do polite cats say when they’re in the way? “Paw-don me! I’m furry sorry.”
  62. What animals can you not trust? Big cats! Because some are cheetahs, and some are always lion!
  63. Why did the cat wear a top hat? Beclaws he was feline sassy
  64. What do cats like to eat on a hot day? A mice-cream cone!
  65. Why do cats always get their way? They are very purr-suasive!
  66. What do you call a cat who lives at the beach? Sandy claws.
  67. How do two cats end a fight? They hiss and make up!
  68. What should you use to comb a cat? A catacomb!
  69. What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mewsic!
  70. How do you know a cat is agitated? He’s having a hissy fit!
  71. What’s a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping!
  72. Why did the cat wear a fancy dress? She was feline fine!
  73. Why was the cat afraid of the tree? Because of its bark!
  74. Did you hear about that cat who swallowed a ball of yarn? She had mittens!
  75. What did the cat say when it was confused? “I’m purr-plexed!”
  76. Where does a cat go when it loses its tail? The re-tail store!
  77. What do you call a cat who lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
  78. How do cats stop crimes? They call claw enforcement!
  79. Why was the cat so agitated? Because he was in a bad mewd!
  80. What do you call a cat who loves to bowl? An alley cat!
  81. What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
  82. What do cats love to do in the morning? Read the mewspaper!
  83. How is cat food sold? Usually, purr the can!
  84. Who delivers presents to cats? Santa Claws!
  85. What do baby cats always wear? Diapurrs!
  86. Why can’t cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!
  87. What’s another name for a cat’s house? A scratch pad!
  88. What was that cat’s favorite book? The Great Catsby!
  89. What should you say to your cat when you leave the house? “Have a mice day!
  90. How does a cat decide what it wants from the store? It flips through the cat-alog!
  91. In what kind of weather is a vet the busiest? When it’s raining cats and dogs!
  92. What state has a lot of cats and dogs? Petsylvania!
  93. What’s a cat’s favorite game to play with a mouse? Catch!
  94. What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain!
  95. Where do cats always fly out of when they travel? Kitty Hawk!

Want more jokes? You’ll love these:

We have even more cat activities:

I would love to keep you fully stocked with creative ideas, yummy recipes, fun crafts, and loads of free printables. Subscribe to Skip to my Lou to get new ideas delivered to your inbox. Follow me on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and Instagram for all my latest updates.

What was your favorite cat joke?

About Cindy Hopper

Learn More

you may also like

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *