Pumpkin Jokes for Kids: Funny Pumpkin Puns and Riddles

Looking for funny pumpkin jokes for kids? These clean pumpkin jokes, pumpkin puns, riddles, and jack-o-lantern jokes are perfect for Halloween parties, fall classroom fun, pumpkin patch trips, lunch box notes, and cozy October laughs.

Pumpkins make fall even more fun, especially when they come with a silly joke. This collection includes kid-friendly jokes about pumpkins, jack-o-lanterns, pumpkin patches, pumpkin pie, and all things fall. Many use simple wordplay with words like pumpkin, patch, squash, gourd, vine, seeds, and pie, so they are easy for kids to understand and fun to read out loud.

Cute smiling pumpkins with the words Pumpkin Jokes for Kids in a playful fall illustration. — These funny pumpkin jokes for kids are perfect for Halloween parties, pumpkin patch trips, classroom fun, and lunch box laughs.

Read them while carving pumpkins, tuck one into a lunch box, use them at a fall party, or print the pumpkin joke cards near the end of this post for easy sharing.

Funny Pumpkin Jokes

Who helps little pumpkins cross the road safely?
The crossing gourd.
What do you call a pumpkin that works at the beach?
A life gourd.
What do you call a pretty pumpkin?
Gourd-geous.
Why do pumpkins sit on people’s porches?
They have no hands to knock.
What did the pumpkin say when asked how it was feeling?
I’m vine, thanks.
What do pumpkins eat at the movies?
Pulp corn.
How does a pumpkin listen to music?
On vine-yl.
What did the pumpkin say to the scarecrow?
You’re outstanding in your field.
Why did the farmer keep staring at his pumpkin patch?
Because it was gourd-geous.
What do you call a pumpkin that tells jokes?
A pun-kin.
Why did the pumpkin go to the doctor?
It was feeling a little seedy.
What did Cinderella say when her carriage turned into a pumpkin?
Oh my gourd!
Why did the man slip on the pumpkin?
It caught him off gourd.
What do you call a pumpkin that plays basketball?
A slam-gourd.
What do you call a pumpkin that can slam dunk?
Michael Gourdan.
Why was the pumpkin so good at school?
It had a lot of seeds of knowledge.
What do pumpkins say when they win?
Gourd job!
Why did the pumpkin take a shortcut?
It wanted to avoid the seedy part of town.
What is a pumpkin’s favorite music?
Vine-yl records.
What do pumpkins say when something surprises them?
Oh my gourd!

Funny pumpkin joke that says Why did the pumpkin patch need a teacher? The little pumpkins were growing wild.

Jack-o-Lantern Jokes

Why are jack-o-lanterns so smart?
A candle makes them bright.
What do you call an athletic pumpkin?
A jock-o-lantern.
Why do jack-o-lanterns smile?
Because they are lit from the inside.
What did the jack-o-lantern say to the candle?
You light up my life.
Why did the jack-o-lantern go to the party?
It wanted to glow with the flow.
What do you call a tired jack-o-lantern?
Sleepy hollow.
Why did the jack-o-lantern get good grades?
It was very bright.
What is a jack-o-lantern’s favorite way to travel?
By candlelight.
Why did the jack-o-lantern look happy?
It had a big bright smile.
What did the jack-o-lantern say to the trick-or-treaters?
Have a glowing good time!

Pumpkin Patch Jokes

Why did the pumpkin go to the pumpkin patch?
To find its roots.
What did the little pumpkin say at the patch?
Pick me! Pick me!
Why did the pumpkin patch win an award?
It was the pick of the season.
What do pumpkins wear to a party?
Their best stems.
What did the pumpkin say after a day at the farm?
That was gourd fun.
Why did the pumpkin stay on the vine?
It did not want to get picked on.
Why was the pumpkin patch so popular?
Everyone wanted to pick a favorite.
What did the pumpkin say when it found the perfect spot?
This is my patch.
Why did the pumpkin bring a map to the patch?
It did not want to get lost in the vines.
What do you call a lazy pumpkin?
A patch potato.

Smiling glowing jack-o-lantern holding an A plus paper with the joke Why did the jack-o-lantern get good grades? It was very bright.

Pumpkin Pie Jokes

What is the best thing to put in a pumpkin pie?
Your teeth.
What did the pumpkin pie say after Thanksgiving dinner?
Good-pie, everyone!
Why was the pumpkin pie so popular?
Everyone wanted a piece of it.
What did the pumpkin pie say to the whipped cream?
You top everything off.
What is a pumpkin pie’s favorite song?
Slice, Slice Baby.
Why did the pumpkin pie go to school?
It wanted to be a little sweeter.
What did the pumpkin say to the pie baker?
You’re filling me with joy.
What happens when you eat too much pumpkin pie?
You get autumn-y ache.
What do you call a pumpkin pie that tells jokes?
A real cut-up.
Why did the pumpkin pie bring a spoon?
It wanted to stir up some fun.

Pumpkin Knock Knock Jokes

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Pumpkin.
Pumpkin who?
Pumpkin spice and everything nice!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Gourd.
Gourd who?
Gourd to see you!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Patch.
Patch who?
Patch you later!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Vine.
Vine who?
Vine not tell another pumpkin joke?
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Pie.
Pie who?
Pie think you’re going to love this joke!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Seed.
Seed who?
Seed you at the pumpkin patch!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad it’s pumpkin season?
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Jack.
Jack who?
Jack-o-lantern ready for Halloween!

Printable Pumpkin Joke Cards

These 12 pumpkin jokes are perfect for printable joke cards. Cut them out and tuck them into lunch boxes, hand them out at a fall party, or place them in a pumpkin bucket for kids to read aloud.

Why was Cinderella bad at football?
Because she had a pumpkin for a coach.
What does a carved pumpkin celebrate?
Hollow-een.
What does a pumpkin call his family?
Pump-kin.
What do you use to fix a broken pumpkin?
A pumpkin patch.
What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
Squash.
What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?
Squash.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite book genre?
Pulp fiction.
What do you call a tiny pumpkin pie?
A cutie pie.
What did the pumpkin say to the pumpkin carver?
Cut it out!
Why did the pumpkin patch need a teacher?
The little pumpkins were growing wild.
What kind of math do pumpkins like?
Pumpkin pi.
What did the jack-o-lantern say on Halloween night?
Let’s get glowing!

More Fall and Halloween Jokes

Keep the laughs going with even more kid-friendly Halloween jokes:

More Pumpkin Fun

Planning a pumpkin patch day, fall classroom party, or Halloween afternoon at home? These pumpkin ideas go perfectly with the jokes:

Favorite Ways to Use Pumpkin Jokes

Pumpkin jokes are easy to use all season long. Add one to a lunch box, read a few before carving pumpkins, use them as party icebreakers, or print the joke cards for a classroom fall activity.

For a simple party idea, place the printable pumpkin joke cards in a pumpkin bucket. Let each child pull out a card and read the joke aloud. It is an easy way to get everyone laughing without needing extra supplies.

I would love to keep you fully stocked with creative ideas, yummy recipes, fun crafts, and loads of free printables. Subscribe to Skip to my Lou to get new ideas delivered to your inbox. Follow me on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and Instagram for all my latest updates.