Ted Lasso quotes are from the mouth of a former college football coach from Kansas given to his current professional soccer team in South London. These funny, winning quotes from the critically acclaimed Apple TV series, Ted Lasso, will have you laughing and thinking about things from his special point of view.

I want to provide you a place at Skip to My Lou to come for inspiration and positive vibes. If you like reading collections of quotes like these, try Good Vibes Quotes and Good Morning Quotes.

Believe from Ted Lasso acrostic

Ted Lasso Quotes

  1. “I promise you there is something worse out there than being sad, and that’s being alone and being sad. Ain’t no one in this room alone.” – Ted Lasso
  2. “I always figured that tea was just gonna taste like hot brown water. And you know what? I was right. It’s horrible. No, thank you.” – Ted Lasso
  3. “Takin’ on a challenge is a lot like riding a horse. If you’re comfortable while you’re doin’ it, you’re probably doin’ it wrong.” – Ted Lasso
  4. “Back where I’m from, you try to end a game in a tie; well, that might as well be the first sign of the apocalypse.” – Ted Lasso
  5. “You know what the happiest animal on Earth is? It’s a goldfish. Y’know why? It’s got a 10-second memory. Be a goldfish.” – Ted Lasso
  6. “If the internet has taught us anything, it’s that sometimes it’s easier to speak our minds anonymously.” – Ted Lasso
  7. “Jamie, I think that you might be so sure that you’re one in a million, that sometimes you forget that out there, you’re just 1 of 11. And if you just figure out some way to turn that ‘me’ into ‘us’…the sky’s the limit for you.” – Ted Lasso
  8. “I come bearing sweet treats to numb the sting of defeat.” – Ted Lasso
  9. “For me, success is not about the wins and losses. It’s about helping these young fellas be the best versions of themselves on and off the field.” – Ted Lasso
  10. “So I’ve been hearing this phrase y’all got over here that I ain’t too crazy about. ‘It’s the hope that kills you.’ Y’all know that? I disagree, you know? I think it’s the lack of hope that comes and gets you. See, I believe in hope. I believe in belief.” – Ted Lasso
  11. “It’s funny to think about the things in your life that can make you cry just knowing that they existed, can then become the same thing that makes you cry knowing that they’re now gone.” – Ted Lasso
  12. “You say impossible, but all I hear is ‘I’m possible.'” – Ted Lasso
  13. “Doing the right thing is never the wrong thing.” – Ted Lasso
  14. “I shouldn’t bring an umbrella to a brainstorm.” – Ted Lasso
  15. “You two knuckleheads have split our locker room in half. And when it comes to locker rooms, I like ’em just like my mother’s bathing suits. I only wanna see ’em in one piece, you hear?” – Ted Lasso
  16.  “Divorce is hard. It doesn’t matter if you’re the one leaving or if…you’re the one who got left. It makes folks do crazy things.” – Ted Lasso
  17. “Ice cream’s the best. It’s kinda like seeing Billy Joel live. Never disappoints.” – Ted Lasso
  18. “I think that if you care about someone and you got a little love in your heart, there ain’t nothing you can’t get through together.” – Ted Lasso
  19. “You know how they say that ‘youth is wasted on the young? Well, I say don’t let the wisdom of age be wasted on you. I just came up with that. I feel pretty good about it.” – Ted Lasso
  20. “I think one of the neatest things about being a coach is the connection you get to make with your players. That’s a loss that hits me a lot harder and is gonna stay with me a lot longer than anything that happens while playing a game on a patch of grass.”
  21. “I feel like we fell out of a lucky tree, hit every branch on the way down, ended up in a pool full of cash and Sour Patch Kids.” – Ted Lasso
  22. “You know Rupert, guys have underestimated my entire life. And for years I never understood why. It used to really bother me. But then one day I was driving my little boy to school and I saw this quote from Walt Whitman painted on the wall there that said “Be curious. Not judgmental.”
  23. “The happiest people don’t have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything.” – Ted Lasso
  24. “I’ve never met a person who’s happy they’re not trying something new.” – Ted Lasso
  25. “It’s the same with fish and chips, or folks and their stories – no matter how you try to enjoy them, there’s always a few bones you gotta pick out of your teeth.” – Ted Lasso
  26. “You know, I heard of a book where the author suggests that the secret to happiness is to lower your expectations. So, basically, the way that I live my life is to either expect nothing and be positively surprised or expect the worst and never be disappointed.” – Ted Lasso
  27. “I think there’s magic in discomfort. It’s a chance to hit the reset button and start over again, but better this time.” – Ted Lasso
  28. “Life is short, and it’s important to do things that make you feel happy. Like singing in the shower. Or using other people’s toothbrushes… actually, scratch that last one.” – Ted Lasso
  29. “It’s funny how a little thing can make a big difference. Like a company sending you flowers when they’re mad at you.” – Ted Lasso
  30. “There’s something beautiful about people who can go through the toughest times and still choose to be kind to others.” – Ted Lasso
  31. “I believe good things happen to good people. And I don’t know about you, but that keeps me getting up every morning.” – Ted Lasso
  32. “The only thing I know for certain is that I know nothing for certain. Except maybe that I make a mean grilled cheese.” – Ted Lasso
  33. “There’s no shame in admitting you’re lost. The only shame is in not asking for help to find your way.” – Ted Lasso
  34. “Kindness is free. Sprinkle that stuff everywhere.” – Ted Lasso
  35. “You know, they say you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. But who really wants a bunch of flies anyway?” – Ted Lasso
  36. “Life is a lot like a box of biscuits. It’s best enjoyed with a good cup of tea and shared with friends.” – Ted Lasso
  37. “Sometimes the hardest part about starting something new is simply letting go of the fear of being bad at it.” – Ted Lasso
  38. “If you’re not failing every now and again, it’s a sign you’re not doing anything very innovative.” – Ted Lasso
  39. “Every person has their own rhythm, their own song. And the world becomes a better place when we learn to dance to each other’s tunes.” – Ted Lasso
  40. “It’s important to remember that even on the darkest days, the sun will rise again tomorrow. And if not, well, I heard the moon is pretty cool too.” – Ted Lasso
  41. “Love is like a good cup of coffee. It’s warm, comforting, and sometimes it keeps you up all night.” – Ted Lasso
  42. “Life’s too short to hold grudges. Let them go, and you’ll feel lighter than a feather caught in a breeze.” – Ted Lasso
  43. “You can’t control what others do, but you can control how you react. Choose kindness, always.” – Ted Lasso
  44. “Sometimes the most valuable lessons come from the most unexpected places. Like a pub chat with a stranger or a good old-fashioned belly flop into a swimming pool.” – Ted Lasso
  45. “Strength isn’t just about how much weight you can lift. It’s also about how much kindness you can carry.” – Ted Lasso
  46. “There’s a special kind of magic in the world that comes from people who are brave enough to be themselves, unapologetically.” – Ted Lasso
  47. “The only way to truly fail is to stop trying. So, as long as you’re trying, you’re succeeding.” – Ted Lasso
  48. “Rainbows only come after the rain. So if you’re going through a storm, hang in there. You might just see something beautiful on the other side.” – Ted Lasso
  49. “Life’s an adventure. Sometimes it’s like a roller coaster, and other times, it’s like a carousel. Either way, embrace the ride.” – Ted Lasso
  50. “Never underestimate the power of a good joke or a warm hug. Both have the ability to turn someone’s day around.” – Ted Lasso
  51. “Boy, I love meeting people’s moms. It’s like reading an instruction manual as to why they’re nuts.” – Ted Lasso
  52. “Little tip for y’all. Fries are called chips. Chips are called crisps. And bangers aren’t great songs, but they do make you feel like dancing because they’re so darn tasty.” – Ted Lasso
  53. “You are more mysterious than David Blaine reading a Sue Grafton novel at Area 51.” – Ted Lasso
  54. “Football is life.” – Dani Rojas
  55. “I feel like we fell out of the lucky tree and hit every branch on the way down, ended up in a pool of cash and Sour Patch Kids.” – Ted Lasso
  56. “This woman is strong, confident, and powerful. Boss, I tell you, I’d hate to see you and Michelle Obama arm wrestle, but I wouldn’t be able take my eyes off of it, either.” -Ted Lasso
  57. “I believe in Communism. Rom-communism, that is. If Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan can go through some heartfelt struggles and still end up happy, then so can we.” – Ted Lasso
  58. “There’s two buttons I never like to hit, alright? And that’s ‘panic’ and ‘snooze.'” – Ted Lasso
  59. “This is a sad moment right here. For all of us. And there ain’t nothing I can say, standing in front of you right now, that can take that away. But please do me this favor, will you? Lift your heads up and look around this locker room. Yeah? Look at everybody else in here. And I want you to be grateful that you’re going through this sad moment with all these other folks. Because I promise you, there is something worse out there than being sad, and that is being alone and being sad. Ain’t nobody in this room alone. Let’s be sad now. Let’s be sad together. And then we can be a gosh-darn goldfish. Onward. Forward.” – Ted Lasso
  60. “You beating yourself up is like Woody Allen playing the clarinet. I don’t wanna hear it. All right?”- Ted Lasso
  61. “Be curious, not judgmental. Curiosity leads to discoveries, judgment leads to conclusions.” – Roy Kent
  62. “Life’s a pitch, and I’m playing my heart out. ⚽️🌟 #TedLassoWisdom”

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From positive ex quotes to strange American sayings, Coach Beard and Ted Lasso intentionally spread positivity and unintentionally help mend broken hearts. Here’s another Ted Lasso-isms, “Gotta love a locker room! Smells like potential!”

Coach Beard (Brendan Hunt) and Ted Lasso (Jason Sudeikis) create an atmosphere of respect, cooperation, and love during the 2 seasons of the show. I hope these best Ted Lasso quotes brightened your day and reminded you to be kind to yourself and others.

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